I think everyone probably gets "worn", even tho life is a wonderful thing, and blessings abound (I think you can be thankful, but worn at the same time)....do we not all get worn...well tell me I am not the only one?
some days (weeks, months, years?) just seem harder.... I know that it has felt this way for me at times...you just get worn out whether its from the everyday day -in-day-out struggles (the dishes need doing again, the boys are screaming...even tho I thought we had that issue "fixed" last week, the garage door is not opening, the stress of feeling the inadequecy and feeling like a total hypocrite while trying to teach your children character in their life when you yourself have trouble with the same issues.. I mean have I myself mastered "be quick to forgive"....um...humbling?
TO the struggles you only pray you have to bear once in this life (these times where we find it hard to see the "all things work together for good") ...it wears you down...and God knows, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28 God gives people in this life to help lighten that burden, but ultimately the only one that can give us that complete rest is Him. He is with us always...because those people that he gives us...they aren't always going to be with us...they might move, they might die, they might hurt us.....anyway.....I needed this song today, so maybe someone else does..... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgDqj-kIL8s
MY MIRACLE BABY
Samuel Nissim Port
Born too soon (but just on time)
Birthday December 12, 2006
First Day in Heaven-December 23, 2006
Samuel had such a hard time, right from the start. At 7 weeks there was bleeding, which we believe was the result of a blood clot that formed and pushed against the placenta. It was such a scary time that first bleed. We checked it out at the hospital, were told that nothing could be done. Except WAIT. It seemed that he was still with me (what a fighter), and it was not discovered that there was really something wrong until a few ultrasounds were performed. They kept track of his weight, blood activity...the usuals, and noticed that he was not gaining the weight like he really should be. I was sent to the specialists at the hospital where there better equipment showed a clearer picture. He was not gaining the weight. They discovered the reason why. And I and others prayed deperately that God would increase his weight. He would gain some...but he was losing ground. Sometimes it would seem that he was doing good because he gained a certain amount, but he was really only half of what he should be. They told me he should weigh...this amount in grams (like I know how much that amount in grams is). I saw a specialist who advised me to call all the family in so that we could all talk together concering this little guy. At first we opted to home and wait and see (talk about tense). He said that there was really no hope for survival at 24 weeks, especially at his weight. I was sent to the hospital after the ultrasound to be re-examined because of a 'reverse-flow' of the blood (which is what the dr's were hoping wouldn't happen...they said that once that happened, they only had a limited time to get the baby out). It ended up that it wasn't reverse-flow...but that one of the veins had 'no-flow'...which usually ended up becoming 'reverse-flow'. We prayed that it would turn-around. The next ultrasound that was performed was followed by an emergency c-section because the 'ifs' became reality.
Born too soon (but just on time)
Birthday December 12, 2006
First Day in Heaven-December 23, 2006
Samuel had such a hard time, right from the start. At 7 weeks there was bleeding, which we believe was the result of a blood clot that formed and pushed against the placenta. It was such a scary time that first bleed. We checked it out at the hospital, were told that nothing could be done. Except WAIT. It seemed that he was still with me (what a fighter), and it was not discovered that there was really something wrong until a few ultrasounds were performed. They kept track of his weight, blood activity...the usuals, and noticed that he was not gaining the weight like he really should be. I was sent to the specialists at the hospital where there better equipment showed a clearer picture. He was not gaining the weight. They discovered the reason why. And I and others prayed deperately that God would increase his weight. He would gain some...but he was losing ground. Sometimes it would seem that he was doing good because he gained a certain amount, but he was really only half of what he should be. They told me he should weigh...this amount in grams (like I know how much that amount in grams is). I saw a specialist who advised me to call all the family in so that we could all talk together concering this little guy. At first we opted to home and wait and see (talk about tense). He said that there was really no hope for survival at 24 weeks, especially at his weight. I was sent to the hospital after the ultrasound to be re-examined because of a 'reverse-flow' of the blood (which is what the dr's were hoping wouldn't happen...they said that once that happened, they only had a limited time to get the baby out). It ended up that it wasn't reverse-flow...but that one of the veins had 'no-flow'...which usually ended up becoming 'reverse-flow'. We prayed that it would turn-around. The next ultrasound that was performed was followed by an emergency c-section because the 'ifs' became reality.
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